I have learned that people are not always what they might seem: The face they paint on from day-to-day might not be at all what lies beneath the image they would have you see. This can be both frustrating and enlightening; painful and surprising. And all is but life's lessons we encounter whether bidden, or unbidden, that shape the direction of our interaction with others. What you give is not always what you receive; but then again, it can be more. The wisdom comes from discerning between the two divergencies. I have learned that the terms love, friendship, and "family" can, at times, be just that: terms. Folks in your life who freely refer to you using these terms may do so recklessly, heedless of the impact on you, the receiver of these exclamations. And you, in your naivet may believe them, taking their words into your heart with welcome. And you, in your artless response, with your heart unbound, give back, that which you think is given to you. Oh, foolish, foolish soul! Sometimes the lessons are painful, are they not? Indeed, they are. How oft have you recited, I shall not allow this to happen again. But you do, because that is your nature: to trust. Though, the frequency of that trust may occur less often than it used to, it still thrives. Will you ever learn? No. For in your heart lies the hope that somewhere, sometime, those terms so blithely used by many, will be truth spoken by one. I have learned that I, have myself, fallen into the categories of the many. I have failed those individuals I have addressed as friends and "family." I have been careless when attaching the term "love" when connecting with folks who have entered my life. But with this acknowledgment of my personal dereliction. From the pain I might have brought others; I hope I have come that much closer to becoming, within the heart of another, that individual who will give those "terms" truth. Copyright Kathy Pippig Harris |
