Men and women often speak different languages. Men are pretty straight forward, but women do have a different way of communicating. There is a lot involved in deciphering the man/woman-speak involved in relationships, but during an argument, it's especially important for us to understand as much as possible.

Fighting is never pleasant especially with your significant other. So its best if you have a plan before you have a problem. To begin with have an idea of what triggers arguments between you. If for example they occur often when you drink, then it might be best to discuss things when you arent drinking. Then its important to understand what your partner wants based on what he/she is saying.

The biggest problem between men and women is communication. And the biggest problem with communication is not listening or hearing what the other person is saying. First there is how to listen. There are 3 ways to listen. One is I agree with what youre saying, Im right. Second is I disagree with you, Im right. Or finally I dont know and Im open to what youre saying. The third way is obviously the balanced way, and helps to prevent arguments.

Another thing to know is what a woman means when she says things. The only way to know is to ask, from a balanced position, which may be hard to do. The key is, are you willing to give up the need to win or be right? If you can do that you can look at the other persons side of it, and more importantly, you can see whats valid, and whats not. If we can approach the dispute balanced, we will offer a safe place to find out whats really bothering the people in our life.

Another way toward better communication is to check if what is being said is being heard. This is done with both parties asking for what they said to be repeated back by the other person. If the other person doesnt get it, then repeat your statements, perhaps with different words to clarify your point. Again ask for a replay by your partner, until they received what you said. Try it both ways, with you repeating what they said. For example, If I heard you right, you want so and so Try it and see how much more is actually understood, and communicated.

Understanding that we are human, that we have emotions, and that we can only control our own, will be the best we can do. If we try to understand the other persons point of view and really listen to them, thats often all thats required.